Yay, Strep throat...

So, yes I got strep throat. I was miserable. I'm feeling a lot better and almost completely well.. otherwise I probably wouldn't be here typing now. But let me say I spent 3 days fighting insomnia.. losing of course.. my body felt like a warzone. With the Penicilln fighting the bacteria, I could fell everything pulsating in my body. It felt as though there were an overloaded washing machine shaking the whole house!! I finally got some sleep last night!! I am super stoked about that. I'm feeling better but I still have to finish off this medicine which I felt like was keeping me from sleeping. Anyways I will be back to normal soon and back to class this week. :)

xo

Here & Now.

Well. I haven't blogged in a super long time. I think it's because I feel like I never have anything to say. And I don't want to come here to complain about life every time I log in. But I do have one tonight, MATH. Math will be the death of me I'm telling you now, lol. I am studying it at grade level and it is kicking my b-u-t-t. I will not let you defeat me, I will win and I will pass this class you mean mean math. Ahhhhh, nice to get that out. So my life hasn't changed much, I still haven't found a job and I'm still not pregnant. I want a baby so badly. I am trying to lose weight and I have injured my back (story of my life) so I cannot workout like I want to. Everything will be alright though. I have a roof over my head, I have my health, and I have my friends and family. So, I'd love to say those are the least of my worries but I think on them daily, lol. Oh well. I fake it til I make it. I'm going to be alright. So now, I'm going to relax, pray and go to bed. Until next time, sweet dreams.

xo

Shake, shake, shake the frame of this house..

Hey guys. I didn't really plan this at all. I'm kind of just talking.. And I totally understand that not everyone wants to hear what I say, I know I write this for my viewers but I also feel like this is Becca's blog this is where I can express myself and be myself and I feel like talking to you guys sometimes is the best way to vent about the things going on in my life. And like I don't tell you guys a lot of personal things because.. it is personal, and I don't really think it's a good idea because I do probably have a lot of friends and family that read my blogs and whatnot.. so you know sometimes that can be apart of the problem. Ya know I wouldn't really sit here and say "Well you know my friend is doing this, or my family is doing that"  I just wouldn't do that. But even with that I just feel like talking about what's going on with my life situation right now. I just, I'm not gonna lie.. I think that the reason a lot of people  come onto blogger or YT whether you do Beauty related videos or blogs or just talk about everyday life.. I think a lot of people do it because they feel lonely. And not everyone, I'm not saying that everyone is like this but I feel like the reason a lot of people start videos or blogs is because maybe their lonely and I think that's the reason why I started my blog and stuff. I mean I think I got really bored over the last year because I've had no job and no luck in that department. I'm not back in school quite yet. And I have no car, well I share a car with my husband but basically I don't have my OWN car anymore. So I've honestly been bored out of my mind with nothing to do. Besides that I just feel like I'm really lonely lately. I feel like I mean I just get mad, like sometimes I'm just like uhhh I'm so mad. And I just get angry about the littlest things. And I'm a pretty understanding person, I just kind of have to think about it for awhile.. but I feel like I'm getting lonely again, I mean that's why I'm blogging this right now. Because I mean I have nothing to do I'm home pretty much alone again.. A lot of my friends are an hour away and my husband works a ton and I have cabin fever and just want to get out of this house! I have a lot of plans for my life I just don't know how to put them in effect. I mean I want to move out soon, I have to push myself to get into school and find a job somehow. I'm thinking of all these things in my head, I always make all these plans that I get excited about and then I'm just like uhhh it's not a good idea.. I don't know but um, like I'm tryin' to plan out my life and I'm trying to grow up you know.. and I feel like I just don't want to be stuck at home anymore. And I don't, I can't do it anymore.. I don't belong at home anymore. It's weird, like my family situation.. I don't really wanna talk about it here again, that's personal stuff. I want to live, I want to have a life, I want to explore.. the world, I mean I've barely even seen my own state.  I want to travel.. there's a lot of things I want to do. So anyways you guys, you know if you ever feel lonely don't hesitate to write me or try to talk to me somehow. I'm here for you guys if you ever wanna talk.  I know how you feel. I know I have friends and stuff I'm not lonely to the point where I'm going to die or anything but I just get depressed or bummed out. I just like people..  I like to be around people, I always like to have friends around me I just feel safer with someone around like I know I have someone there to talk to. Thank you for everything.. you guys mean a lot to me. But I love you guys. And I hope you all are having an awesome day! See you in my next blog.

xo

PCOS: Soul Cysters

Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome. I've spent so long being bummed and depressed because I suffer from that, partly because I felt like I was one of the only people my age that do. Well that I am associated with anyways. I also had my thyroid check because of all the weight gain I had. Luckily my test came out normal, but it seems like I was almost hoping that it wouldn't so I would have something else to blame my unhappiness on. Anywhoo. Yes, I have started my journey on getting healthy and getting on with my life. I've been trying to lose weight and get healthy and be happy again. It's a crazy journey, and I know I've put myself out there and might get some ridicule or whatnot.. but I feel like this is a way I can hold myself accountable for my fitness. Now with the PCOS I don't want to get too much on the personal side but basically.. I'm 26. And I want babies. You could imagine how this illness makes that quite difficult for prenancy. And the weight gain doesn't help. I don't know too much about it because I have focused on being angry because my body has let me down. I've spent so much time moping and crying and saying "why me? why now? why ever?" I don't really know what else to type right now but here is some information:

What is PCOS?

Polycystic ovary syndrome (PCOS) is the most common female endocrine disorder, affecting approximately 5%-10% of all females. PCOS is a hormonal disorder that involves multiple organ systems within the body, and is believed to be fundamentally caused by insensitivity to the hormone insulin. It can be diagnosed in all phases of life - in girls as young as 8-9 years of age, up through post-menopause. Although PCOS is one of the leading causes of infertility, the reproductive aspects of the disorder are secondary. PCOS is not limited to women of reproductive age or potential.
Common symptoms of PCOS include:

• irregular or no menstrual periods (for women of reproductive age)
• irregular ovulation, with or without monthly bleeding
• acne
• excess hair growth on the face and body
• thinning scalp hair
• accumulation of unruptured follicles on the periphery of the ovaries (mislabeled as "cysts", often called polycystic ovaries)

It is not necessary to have all of these symptoms to have PCOS. In fact it is not necessary to have "polycystic ovaries" to have PCOS. PCOS manifests itself differently in each woman.
In addition to the above, approximately 60% of women with PCOS have weight management issues which can lead to obesity with only normal caloric intake. Energy in the form of glucose (food) is stored right away as fat, instead of being made available for other functions within the body. This can lead to chronic fatigue and undernourishment, despite the fact that there is adequate food intake and even an appearance of overnourishment. However, it's important to note that 40% of women with PCOS are of normal weight, or even fall under a normal weight range.
There is no cure for PCOS, but it can be successfully managed through diet, exercise, and in some cases medical intervention. Management of PCOS is essential, as unmanaged PCOS can progress to diabetes, and can also lead to certain forms of cancer if unaddressed. Proper management of PCOS often eliminates all symptoms. Some women with managed PCOS are among the healthiest within the population because of their lifestyle choices

xo

Un, deux, trois..no one ever does it like that anymore.

Sorry no words lately. My mind is everywhere. I've been going to the gym every other day. I'm still working on getting there daily. I've been wondering a bunch about where my life is going. And i'm never really sure of that answer. Because partly because I have no idea where I want it to go. Crap. I mean I know I want to be successful and happy mostly, but I'm not quite sure how I will get there. Babies on my brain. Yeah I like babies, and I want one. Not yet though. I don't think I'm ready just yet. I'd get a puppy, dogs are cute, but I don't really think I want one of those either. Oh, I know what I want. to get the hell out of here. To have my own house. YES, that is what I want. lol. I'm bored and my brain has nothin interesting on mind. So this is just mindless rant. Just an expressive way to get shit off my chest. so.. I guess I will just go. But I am eating better and not sleeping great. I need a new bed, pronto.

xo

"Get Fit Legit": A series.

Alrighty, here we are. So as you can tell from the title of this post, this particular blog is about my 'get fit legit' series I am starting. So first of all some background info. The series is going to be a my journey of a lifestyle change of health and recovery. Now the reason I say recovery is because there has been a lot of damage, physical and emotional to my body. From being sick and those things have led up to some weight gain. Scott (my husband) and I have been together for 5 years and some odd months (engaged for 2, married for 1). Anyways in these 5 years we haven't ate the best but it was never a problem until we had no work, and I got sick. We were active in the gym until we couldn't afford it anymore. But anyways I'm not going to bore you with the details. Scott now has a job and I'm healing but I and still hendered by this weight gain. Scott has worked out for about 8 months (He has always been skinny) and now he is lean and cut and lookin' buff. =) So now he is working out a plan for me. We started Monday working out together and I must say it is so much easier when you have a support system. So our 'get fit' plan consist of us working out 5-6 days a week, 3 of them being wight training and thee rest lots of cardio. I am eating better too!! I plan to vlog/blog about it to keep myself motivated and to see my results and achievements. I'm really proud of myself for getting to this point. For months I moped around being depressed because of getting sick and gaining weight and not being able to do with my life what I want right now.. But I'm stopping, calming down, breathing and taking control. I feel much better about being able to do this. So here I go you guys. You're welcome to come along for this crazy roller coaster of a ride. Because I know it will be.. I'm ready to grow. And I'm not afraid of the tears, lol.

xo

Holy forgotten information batman..geez

You guys I'm sorry I have been gone for a week or so. It was like an act of congress to get into my blog! Apparently I signed up for this blog with an ancient email because I used my current one for my previous (failed) blog, lol. As soon as I finally figured out I could even recover this info, I was good to go. And so we go forth. I'll swap those emails out asap. Anyways nothing more than a useless rant for tonight because it is late now and I am going to the GYM tomorrow, haha. I will catch you guys up on the whole "Get Fit Legit" Series when I come back. I just wanted to let you know I'm finally back and glad I got it all figured out =)

xo